By Toni Harris Taylor
The word “resilient” means the ability to spring back or rebound, to return to the original form or position after being bent, compressed or stretched.
This is truly a fitting definition for many of us who have a lot of life going on. Whether it is personal or family illness, depression, lack of money, issues with our children, or death of a loved one, the ability to work through any of these issues and to bounce back from them is often a skill that many must master.
Let’s be clear about one thing. There is no segregation of your work life and your personal life. If you are having a major crisis in your personal life, then your business will be affected, and vice versa.
Turning a setback into a comeback
So how do you flex your resilience muscles and bounce back after a setback? Here are my five “S.T.E.P.S.” to help you come back from a setback.
- Show up. One of the best ways to build resilience is to keep showing up even when you are having a difficult time and you don’t feel like it. Showing up helps to distract you from your problems and allows you to shift your focus. Showing up is also a motivator to others who may know that you are dealing with some of life’s adversities and see you continue to show up no matter what. In turn, pushing forward over obstacles is a great way to build resilience muscles and helps you to stay focused.
- Talk to yourself. Positive self-talk is a great way to push yourself when times are tough. You may have to talk yourself into moving forward. Part of talking to yourself is filling your mind with positive motivation to maintain a positive attitude. When I was a financial advisor, I drove 36,000 miles during my first year in the business. I used the time wisely to feed my mind and maintain a positive attitude through a very difficult situation. Sometimes we have to kick ourselves into gear, and developing an attitude of positivity will go a long way to help you bounce back.
- Eliminate excuses. “If you really want something, you’ll find a way. If not, you’ll find an excuse.” How powerful and true this statement is! l. If you want to build your resilience muscles, you must find a way to eliminate potential excuses and cop-outs in your life. Delegate and say no to free yourself from extra responsibilities.
- Persevere. I have a client who is a top financial advisor in his company. One day, he woke up feeling dizzy and unable to walk in a straight line. His diagnosis was vertigo. It affected him personally and professionally. Yet, at the end of that year, he was able to excel and produced his highest grossing year. When I asked him the key to his success, he stated that it was his desire to persevere through the obstacle and not quit. He said he thought about quitting and felt sorry for himself (which he admits he did for a brief time), but his coaches, management and family pushed him to keep moving despite the illness. He resolved to do just that and remains a top producer today.
- Get support. You cannot be successful on your own. Everybody needs support and help. The key is to ask for help when you are bouncing back from a setback. Who is in your corner? Who supports you when you are not feeling worthy and up to yourself? The client I mentioned above asked for help from his assistant who drove him to appointments, his management, as well as his coaches, who helped him not to feel sorry for himself and taught him how to get out of his own way.
Remember that whenever you experience a crisis, you should keep taking drastic S.T.E.P.S. to be resilient. Show up whether you feel like it or not. Talk to yourself with positive words and maintain a positive attitude. Eliminate excuses by delegating and saying no to the less important things. Persevere around and through obstacles, and ask for support from your coaches, management and family. If you keep on stepping when life’s challenges appear, you will be successful, no matter what.
Toni Harris Taylor is a motivational speaker, marketing strategist and certified coach. She helps her audience and clients take drastic steps to achieve drastic results. You can reach her at www.toniharris.com.